Tips for Staying Healthy-draft one
There are several tips for staying our health. For example, doing exercise every day is very important. According to some research reports, show we should exercise three times a week, thirty minutes every time. That will help us keep a normal figure. In addition, drinking a lot of water is good for our health, too. Because the water can make some toxin out of our body. We drink at least 2000 c.c. one day. But I think the most important tip is keeps carefree minds. Many long-lived people exercise every day, eat healthy food, drink enough water and keep a carefree mind. If you want to stay healthy, start to try my tips.
posted by 郭包子 @ 1:07 AM
8 Comments:
寫的不錯喔!
Because the water can make some toxin out of our body.要用
Because of the water can make some toxin out of our body.
Because the water can make some toxin out of our body.
要改成
→Because of the water can make some toxin out of our body.
If you want to stay healthy, start to try my tips.
逗號後面加個you will吧
整體來看都還不錯欸!
有幾個小建議*_
There are several tips for staying our health.
→for us to stay healthy
感覺stay是表狀態_
, drink enough water and keep a carefree mind.
→第3個逗點改成and比較好吧!
：］
OK，I will try your tips.
start to try my tips.
你可以改成→trying my tips!
我覺得降比較順耶~!
According to some research reports, [show] we should exercise three times a week[,] thirty minutes every time.
↑↑↑沒記錯的話要用showed，逗點改and
We drink at least 2000 c.c. one day.
↑↑↑感覺很沒點，用個should應該會更好，或是前面加個so
Many long-lived people exercise every day, eat healthy food, drink enough water and keep a carefree mind.
→drink前加and
Because the water can make some toxin out of our body.
→Because of
We drink at least 2000 c.c. one day.
→前面加個所以 therefore
"There are several tips for staying our health. For example, doing exercise every day is very important."
因為後面已經提到是example了,所以建議寫成doing exercise 是several tips的其中之一~~
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